I was riding the elevator of my residence hall, when I noticed a big yellow paper with the words "Sexual Assault Reported by Student". I thought it had to be from another campus, SMU is the safest place. I decided to do some research on assaults and violence, not only on campus, but related to SMU students; I was surprised by how many articles I found.
Whether it was for stealing a purse, or sexually assaulting a students, incidents like these occur somewhat frequently at SMU. I'd like to say I was in shock, but I wasn't. All of these incidents happened after 2am. We all know that there is violence out there, there are crazy people everywhere. Sexual assaults, stealing, assaulting at gunpoint, these actions are all unacceptable. But I believe though, and disagree with me if you don't, that if they happen after 2am you somehow asked for it. 2am is late at night, when streets are almost empty and the dark is the only witness. I am not saying that the victims of assaults have the fault for what happened, not at all. I am just saying that they didn't take the precautions needed, like never walking to your car alone. It is proven that attackers like to "hunt" for their victims at night. We all know that it is unsafe to walk the streets alone, and to travel by yourself at night.
My point is, if you know you are going to be out late, make sure it is with a group. Don't drive or walk by yourself. Statistics prove that you will end up loosing. Want it or not, attackers are everywhere, even in the places we least expect it (like Highland Park).
This following article persuaded me to write this blog post. About a week ago, a teenager named Tyler Clementi committed suicide after finding out that he was taped having homosexual sex with his male partner. What kind of roommate would do that? What would he gain out of it? I somehow thought that maybe Tyler Clementi's roommate was trying to get rid of him because they weren't happy living together. They annoyed each other.
This event caused me to reflect on roommate relationships and how it is implorable that all roommates make an effort to get along with each other. I lived in boarding school for two years, so you could say I have experience in the roommate field. My first year at boarding school I had a "not so good" relationship with my roommate. The reason was that we had the worst schedules ever. I liked to go to bed late and she didn't; I liked quiet for studying, she wanted loud music. We were honestly like water and oil, complete opposites. I truly believe though, that what got us over the point of not talking and finally making up was respect. I respected that she wanted to go to bed earlier, so I would turn off the lights and listen to my ipod if I couldn't sleep. She respected that I wanted quiet, so she would use headphones. It took a while for us to get adjusted to each other, but it was worth it. We are now really good friends. You have to understand that respect is the base for every relationship, especially roommates. If you don't have respect, the relationship will sooner or later fall apart.
Roommate relationship's come with compromises. It takes two to start and solve a problem. Work together to fix it until you know there is nothing left to do. If you do, I guarantee you that you can become the best of friends.
I am also aware though, that sometimes there are people who are not compatible with each other. Sometimes two people are just not meant to live together. So if you know that there is no way you can live with your roommate, talk to someone about it. Don't just take the easy way and piss him off until he decides he's had enough of you and leaves. You never know how people will react when they get annoyed. We have Tyler Clementi as an example of a boy that got so sick of his roommate and all the crap he made him go through that he committed suicide.
Here are some helpful tips on how to deal with those little things that bother you about your roommate that will truly make a difference in your relationship. But remember the one and only thing that will help is RESPECT.
1. Set boundaries.
2. Rearrange the room
3. Create a cleaning schedule.
4. Vacate the premises.
5. Let go of the little things.
6. Become a better roommate.
I hope his was helpful to everyone who needed it, and if you have any comments on how to ease these problems please post a comment!
Thanks!
